Week 12 - Finale

It has been so long since I have written a blog.  I am sorry.  The last weeks of the program went so fast and were just so crazy I could not keep track of anything.  So let me see...were did I leave off.  In the last weeks our workouts just got harder and harder.  A lot more running to get us ready for the mini marathon.  In one of our last weeks of workouts I got to enjoy the "weight vest" for the first time.  Hannah and I were just running our morning laps for warm up and I saw EJ and CeCe looking around and talking as EJ is holding the vest.  As I start to run by them, EJ calls me over and puts it on me.  The best part is that Hannah started laughing and making fun of me that I had to wear the vest they went and got her one too!  This vest just goes over your shoulders and then Velcro around your waist and it weighs in at 20 pounds!  It was so crazy to feel how heavy it was.  By this time I had lost 40 pounds so to put half if it back on was a killer.  It was so crazy to me to start running with that extra weight on.  I felt like I was going to die but in reality I was running with that weight on.  I just did not realize how hard it was to run with it because it came off in small amounts and now to add it all back one at once was a real eye opener to feel that weight on again.  I said at the end of that workout when I got to take it off was I don't ever want that amount of weight back on real or fake! (The only time I will let that happen is when I get pregnant!)  The last day of group workouts was the best.  We played dodge ball!  It was all of the trainers, alumni and all the other team members against us rookies!  I felt like I was a kid back in school.  It was so much fun!  I think I laughed more than anything but it was a good workout.  Everyone kept trying to get Rick out because he was killing our team.  We did end up winning 3 out of the 5 games!  They were kicking our butts and Rick kept calling us losers and I told him thanks because we are losers...we are weight losers :)

The other big adventure in the final weeks was out mini marathon.  I was so scared to run it.  Was I going to make it, could I do it, would I make the goal I set for myself?  I had been running but I was still just so scared.  I had never thought I would do anything like this in my life.  I am not the kind of person that is like "hey lets go run a mini marathon."  I hate to run!  I have never liked to run.  People would always say to me but you played basketball.  I would say no I took 5 steps and I would be at the other end of the court that is not running.  Since the mini was outside for the first time it was open to the public so we could have anyone we wanted to run with us.  So since Melissa is a little pregnant, JC said he would run with me.  So it is race day...did not really sleep the night before because I was so nervous and anxious that I could not sleep.  So now it is time for the run.  JC and I started out doing well.  I got a good pace and we were doing about a 12 minute mile.  I was very happy with how we were doing.  At this rate, we would make my 3 hour goal.  At about mile 3.5 we had our first cheer group.  Running up the hill I had my little cheerleader there waiting on me and she even ran with us for a short distance.

Then the madness continued...I feel like we did a good time on our first lap.  We crossed the finish line on our first lap around the hour and half mark.  I was still feeling pretty good by that point but I could tell the wall was coming and coming fast.  At about mile 8 I had my first break down.  I just thought my legs could not go on anymore and I started to cry which in turn I could not control my breathing.  JC keep yelling at me from behind while he was pushing me that I was not going to stop.  That I was going to do this no matter what it took.  So after getting myself together we took off again.  At mile 10, we met up with my cheer block again...and break down number 2!  I was just so tired and I did not think my legs could go anymore.  I was just getting so frustrated because all I wanted to do was kick butt at this and I just could not even get my legs to move.  My knee was starting to kick my butt and the pain was setting in.  I was not going to give up.  So we started to run again, but at about mile 11.5 I just could not take the pain anymore and I had to walk.  I was not going to give up.  By this point it was close to my 3 hour goal finishing and I knew I would not make it but I was not going to give up.  I was going to finish even if I had to drag my butt over the finish line.  With a time of 3hours 25 minutes and 38 seconds I crossed the finish line!

I cried so hard when I finished.  I think I had everyone around there crying too.  I just could not believe that I really finished a mini marathon.  I just never ever thought that I would do that.  Seeing how I could hardly run 3 months ago when I started this program.  It was a great feeling and accomplishment that I am glad I can say I have done.  Now, Mel wants me to run in the Indy Mini with her next year. 

Last...the finale.  We had our final program last Saturday at the Performing Arts Center which was a part of the body building competition that Rick and Tina also do.  It was such a busy week leading up to the finale...just so much to do.  On Monday, Mom, Mel, Olivia and I went shopping to find me a dress for the finale.  I have always hated shopping so I did not know how this would go since I have lost weight.  I would usually get depressed because nothing would fit and then I would just go home and eat something because it would make me feel better since I was depressed but this time it was going to be different.  The day started at Macy's because that is where I have had luck before.  Mel and I pretty much cleared out the racks of anything we thought would fit or that looked cut.  About 20 dresses later it was time to hit the fitting room.  The best part was that they all fit, some where even too big, and one was a size that I thought would never fit.  After trying them all on and modeling them all, I finally found a dress.  Since it was a little more than I wanted to spend we decided to keep looking.  I ended up getting a skirt at another store and thought I would just wear a blouse that I had at home and that would be fine.  Well when I got home and did another fashion show with what tops I had I kept getting that "look".  I knew that they wanted me to get that dress.  So Tuesday I went with Hannah to help her pick out her dress.  First stop was Macy's to pick up my dress that I had picked out.  While we were doing that my team mate Carrie came out of the dressing room as she was picking out her dress.  So after helping Carrie it was finally time for Hannah.  What a day...this girl can shop!  After about 5 stores, she finally agreed to get the dress from Windsor that she looked so hot in!  I have never had so much drama shopping for a dress as i did with her.  Very long story short is she tried on this dress and did not think it looked good on her.  I told her she looked great in it.  My friend Sarah that runs the store told her she looked hot!  Three complete strangers told her she looked amazing in it...finally after 5 people and about an hour later she finally got the dress!!!!!  She looked so hot!  What do you think?

Finale night was just very emotional.  After everything we had all been through and the wonderful new friends we met was coming to an end.  It went by so fast.  When this first started I thought the 15 weeks was never going to end and now it was here.  It was truly bittersweet.  We all got introduced and then we watched the video that Toby had made to showcase the past 15 weeks.  It was amazing!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GOL6Uy1sS_A

It is just so crazy to see the amazing changes we all had.  Work was wonderful and donated standees of each one of us for the finale.  It was the picture from our very first day at orientation.  To see the difference in everyone was just great.  Not even just our sizes but the look on everyone’s faces also.  All the standees a lot of us were not smiling or if it was you could tell we were not happy.  At the finale, everyone was smiling...everyone was happy...and everyone I personally believe finally loved themselves for what they had finally become.  Personally I know that is true for me.  I was not happy with myself and I did not love myself and now I am back to the person that used to be.  Happy, smiling, laughing and just care free!  Here is my difference from the beginning until now.

I will give you some number just so you can see how well we did.  The average weight loss for the group was 50.35 pounds and as a group we lost a total of 1107.6 pounds.  That to me is just crazy.  The first place winner was George and he lost a total of 88 pounds and Scott got runners up with 85 pounds.  I was very happy with my personal weight loss.  I started this program at 328 pounds I finished it at 276.2 for a total weight loss of 51.8 pound and percentage of weight loss of 15.8%.  Since the program has ended I have lost another 4.2 pounds so my total to date is 56 pounds.  Last night we got our blood test back that we had to do for the contest.  My cholesterol went from 203 to 163 down 40 and I am now well below the risk for diabetes.  I just can not say it enough how much this program saved me and in more than one way.  I am a changed person and mark my words I will never be that other person ever again!  So let the new journey begin.  To prove to myself that I can keep doing this on my own and to make the FWSW program proud of what I have done and learned.  Thank you for all of your love and support because I could have never done this without you by my side.  Thank you and I love you all.

End of Week 11

I know...I know...I am late doing my blog again this week.  It was been a very busy week at work and I have not even been the office since last Friday!  Well weigh in went good on Monday.  I lost 3.0 pounds this week for a total of 40.4!  I can not believe I am over 40 pounds.  It is just so crazy to think in such a short time I have lost so much weight.  I do have to let you know, we found out Monday night that this coming Monday is the last weigh in we get to see.  For the last weigh in we have to weigh in backwards so we can not see our weight!  I don't like that...I want to see it!  I know it is not all about the number but how you feel, but as hard as we work during workouts and how hard we push our selves seeing that number is kind of like a great pat on the back!  I know it will make for a great surprise at the finale but it still doesn't mean that I have to like it.

So I had a major flash back this week during workouts.  E.J., our trainer, yelled out "alright...everyone on the baseline!"  Oh ya...that's right...I had flash backs of dad and Coach Kessie yelling at us!  If he would have said "suicides" after that I really would have wanted to find myself a hole!  I hated those back in high school and I still hate them now, but after the workout that E.J. made us do, now that I think about it, suicides might have been easier.  I still don't want to do them but they might have been easier.

The other great thing that happened this week is that we are supposed to start running longer to get ready for the marathon on July 2nd.  So me and two other FWSW members decided to go and run the first lap of the marathon.  I was very scared because we drove it the night before.  We all started out walking the lap for a warm up.  Once we got going I started making small goals for myself.  First, I was like I am going to run to the stop sign, and then I ran a block.  I just made myself run more and more and finally we were in the home straight away.  We parked at Bandito's so I decided that I was going to run the all the way from Scott and Illinois to the Bandito parking lot without stopping.  The great part...I did it!!!  I did have to stop for a second at a stop light so I didn't get hit by a car, but other than that I did not stop.  I was so proud of myself.  I never thought I would be able to do that.  I know I would have never been able to do that 3 months ago.  It is just crazy for me to think of what I can do know that I have lost the weight.  I just feel so great!  Well that is all I have for this week.  If you want to come run with us in the marathon there is still time to sign up and I am still in need of sponsors.  See you next week :)

More about Week 10

So I just found out a little more info today that I had to share with you.  Today after workouts we found out where all the teams and individuals fell for weigh ins by percentage for the week.  I was in 5th place for individuals overall and the Hot Pink Lady's came in 1st place!!!!!!!!  We finally did it!  We always had it in us it just took a few weeks to get it to come out!  So until next week!

End of Week 10

Week 10 is now over.  We did not weigh in Monday night because we had a special dinner at Catablu instead.  So we weighed in this morning before workouts.  I like morning weigh ins.  I lost 5.8 pounds this week for a total of 37.4 pounds in 10 weeks.  I was so excited to see another good weigh in.  My luck so far has been if I have a good weigh in one week I have a bad one the next.  Not this week!  I am just getting that much closer to my goal for the end of this. 

This has been a fun week.  For workouts I am finally getting to run again.  I never thought I would say that I am glad to run...I have always hated to run.  That's way I only played volleyball and basketball you didn't have to do much running.  For basketball I took about 4 steps and I was at the other end.  So that is why it is such a big deal to me that I am enjoying this.  Workouts have been getting harder and harder which is expected I guess but to me I still have that mental idea of that I am still at my heavy weight and I can't do this.  But I can!  I run around the gym now for warm ups and run for 15-20 minutes straight and I don't stop.  When we first started I could not even run!  And to think that I will be running a half marathon (13.1 miles) in just 5 weeks scares the crap out of me more than you know!  I know it will be great though.  What a way to end this.  I just found out tonight that my brother-in-law is going to run in it with me.  I don't know if that is a good idea...Mister Navy might start yelling at me like we are in boot camp!  :)  Just kidding JC...I am excited because I know you will help me get through it and help me make it to the end.  I would love to run the whole race without walking...that is my goal.  We will see if we can make it happen.

I also have to tell you about my wonderful surprise that I got on Friday when I got home from work.  Friday is the only day that Andrew beats me home from work.  The rest of the week he works all day and then goes to his night summer class and gets home around 8.  So to my surprise when I got home Friday there was a beautiful bouquet of flowers!  He as sitting in the living room and I walked in there and asked "What did you do?"  I usually don't let him buy me flowers, so when he does I always think that he did something wrong or he wants something.  Well, he did not do anything wrong or want anything, he got them for me Just Because!  They even had my favorite flowers in them which made it even better.  He also told me that he was going to take me shopping and I could get a new outfit from top to bottom...shirt, pants, shoes, and purse!  The kicker was I didn't have to get rid of anything to get these new cloths.  For those of you that don't know, Andrew says I have to many shoes, and purses so if I ever buy new shoes or purses I have to get rid of 2!!!!  So when he told me I did not have to get rid of anything I then again asked "What did you do?"  But he did take me shopping on Sunday and I ended up getting 2 new shirts and 2 new pairs of shoes!!!  

Here is one of my new tops!

 

Like I said before Monday night they had a special dinner for us at Catablu.  The owner came out and talked to use and the head chef came out and showed us how they cooked our meal right in front of us.  It was so cool to see.  We had a wonderful appetizer of a flatbread with oven roasted tomato and fresh mozzarella...So good!  We then had a salad that was mixed greens with sweet mango and a berry vinaigrette.  It was also very good.  I had never had a sweet mango before and I would have that again.  For our main entree we had a macadamia nut crusted salmon with mixed vegetables.  As most of you know I HATE seafood!  So I told myself that I would try the salmon just so I could say I tasted it.  It was AMAZING!!!  I can not believe I liked it.  I might even have salmon again :)  Last they made fresh fruit with a raspberry sorbet and again it was very good.  It was just such a fun night out with all the teams and learning some new cooking ideas that are good and healthy.  Last before we left we took a team picture...so here is the HOT Pink Ladies and our RD's are on the end.

I did another updated picture of me side by side.  So now you will get to see the changes from week 1 to week 10.  It is just crazy to me to see the difference.  So see for yourself.

Last, I wanted to ask you all a great favor in helping me out.  In running the half marathon we are asking people to make a Pledge for us.  We are raising money to help fund the FWSW for next year and years to come.  Personally, I wish I had all the money in the world so I could give it to them for helping me get me back.  I don't know if I could have ever done this without there help and I just want to help as much as I can.  I was one of the lucky ones to be selected to be apart of FWSW and I take GOD every day for it!  I am finally me again and getting healthy so I can reach all of my life goals that I have set for myself in the future.  So, if you could all help me with this I would be very grateful.  Anything you could pledge will be put to good use.  So thank you for helping with this little thank you I can give them for helping me get my life back.  Thank you for all of your love and support through all of this.  I love all of the messages and texts.  It just makes me smile to feel all the love I am getting from you.  Love you all.

End of Week 9

Well...another week down.  It is going so fast!  This week's weigh in was much better than last week.  I lost 4.6 pounds for a total of 31.4 pounds in 9 weeks.  I know I have not giving my weigh before but anyone can go on the website and look so I might as well talk about in here.  They best part about this weigh in is that I am now under 300 pounds!  Mark my word...I will NEVER be that again.  I can't believe that I ever let myself get that bad but I did.  Know I have done the work to get better and get healthy again.  Andrew asked me what my new goal was going to be now that I am under 300.  I had not thought about it.  So my new goal is that I want to be 275 by the end of the 15 weeks.  With that being said to reach that goal I will have to loss around 3.5 pounds a week to be at 275.  I know that I can do this. 

This weekend I went through my closet to get rid of all of the cloths that are too big for my garage sale in two weeks.  Mean do I have a lot of cloths that are too big!!!  I love it!  I fit into some old pants that were 4 sizes smaller than I had been wearing.  That just feels so good.  I had to go out and buy a belt for the first time in years to hold my pants up until I go and get new cloths.  It was really hard not to get any new cloths because I know I would not be in them for long but I really just want to shop!  I have not said that in a long time.

Another great thing happened today.  I was getting ready for work this morning and after I got dressed I thought that I really looked pretty.  I have not felt that way about myself in a very long time.  Andrew would always get mad at me because he would always tell me how beautiful I was but I could not believe him because I did not believe it myself.  I had on a jean skirt and a pretty fitted top on for the first time in a long time and I just told Andrew, I feel pretty today.  I can't believe how much confidence I have regained since starting this.  I believe in myself more and know that I can do anything that I put my mind too.  When I gained all the weight I used to go to work every day in jeans and a T-shirt and my hair in a ponytail because I just did not care about what I looked like.  Now, I am noticing that I make an effort in the morning when I get ready for work.  I dress up for work now and enjoy looking nice with my hair and make-up done.  It is crazy to me just how much I have changed the way I view myself in just the past 9 weeks.

In other updates, I tried running again for the first time in 3 weeks today.  I did it very slowly and I only did a little bit here and there.  I don't want to push it too soon.  It is nice to know that when I was running it did not hurt!  That is very good.  I don't like being injured because I just feel like I can't give everything I have.  Well, I think that is all for this week.  Next week we do not weigh in until Tuesday morning before workouts because of a special class we have next Monday so you will have to wait until then to find out how this week goes.

End of Week 7 & 8

I know...I know...I am running a little behind on blogs.  I have been so busy with work I have not had the time to get any done.  Okay...here is to get you up to date on everything.  I had a great weigh in for week 7.  I lost 7.4 pounds!!!  Everyone asked me how I did that and I have no clue.  I did not do anything different and worked out the same, so my guess is that it was just my time to lose it.  Week 8 weigh in was not good at all!  I only lost .2 pounds for a total weight loss of 27 pounds in 8 weeks.  I really can not believe that we only have 7 weeks left.  It is going by so fast and I am really not ready for it to be over.  For those of you that don't know, our last week of the program we have to run a 1/2 marathon and it is open to the public.  If you are interested in running in it just go to the link below and sign up.

http://www.runrace.net/findarace.php?id=11183IN2&tab=a2

As far as my injury goes I am starting to get a little better.  I tried jogging for the first time on Tuesday and it did not hurt to bad.  So hopefully I will be able to finally pick it up again next week in workouts.  I thought I would never say this but I miss running.  Well I guess it is really a jog to normal people but to me it is running.  Workouts have been getting harder and harder but it is so worth it.  Our TV show was on the other night and they showed some footage from the very beginning of the program to now and it is such a big difference from the way everyone looks to the workouts we are doing.  I am just so proud of everyone because we are all working so hard and it is paying off. 

And I saved the best for last.  I know that I am two weeks late but here is the new hair cut!  This is the only picture I have of it.  And this is Hannah that is in the picture with me, she is a Senior at South Side and I went and took pictures of her before she went to prom.  She is kind of like my little sister :)

End of Week 6

What a week.  I am so sorry that I am writing week 6 blog at almost the end of week 7.  One it has been one crazy week!  It is prom craziness at work, and two the blog has been down I guess.  So here we are...Monday's weigh in was not a good one.  I don't know why I am so all over the board.  This week I only lost 1.2 pounds for a total lost of 19.4 pounds.  I know that is great but I was not happy at all.  I know I could do so much better.  I also thought it was going to be another good week because I thought I did so good, so it was a little disappointing to not do so good.  After weigh in I was looking at my food log and I think the reason that I did not do to tell is that I did not eat all of the calories that we are supposed to.  We are supposed to eat 1600 calories and our dietitians told me I should be right at that number.  I know it is no excuse but this week was so crazy I really didn't eat.  Most of my days I only had 1100 calories!  So I know that was a big part.


Well...I have had my first injury of the competition.  This week I have been fighting a pulled calf muscle.  It started to feel a little bad last week but by the weekend I did not think anything about it.  Then Tuesday morning workout I could hardly walk or ran by the end of the workout.  My calf was a solid ROCK!  By the time I got home from workouts, showered, and was getting ready for work I could not even walk!  If I tried to walk it was a shooting pain right up my leg.  You all know me I am stubborn and I was not going to give up.  It was not any better Wednesday morning for workouts.  I could somewhat walk but they would not let me workout.  I got sent to the pool to do a workout there.  The great thing was that this week was our pool workout on Thursday, so I did get 2 pretty good workouts in this week.  Tina made me go to the doctor to find out what was going on.  I could not get into my doctor so one of our sponsor Dr.'s that I know checked it out for me.  He said that I was going to be okay but just needed to take it easy for a couple days and gave me some medication to help me out a little bit.  Today was the first day that I had been on it all day long and it did not hurt at all.  That makes me feel so great!  So Tuesday he said I could start working back into workouts!  That's good because I don't like being on the sidelines.

So I did do some other crazy stuff this week.  Some of you might now but I cut off 12" off my hair.  Yep...It is all gone...Here is the before picture.

I have not taken an after picture yet.  I will do that tomorrow and post it.  Don't worry...I donated it all to locks of love!

Next I would love to show you some beautiful flowers that I got this week from Grandma and Grandpa Sands.  I was so surprised when I got to work and I had this large basket of flowers on my desk.  So thank you so much!  I love them and it means so much to me to know how proud you are of me!

Last...I had Andrew take a picture of me so you could see the changes (Mel stop reading the blog if you don't want to see the changes) I forgot to take one the first week we started so I am going to use the last picture that I had taken of me which was Christmas (sorry honey to cut you out). The new picture was taken last Friday at the end of 5 weeks.  Also wanted to tell you that the shirt I have on in the new picture didn't fit 6 weeks ago :) ( I also Photoshopped these pictures together so you can see them side by side)

Andrew said that he was sad that I was losing some assets on the backside that me married me for and he does not know about this :)  I just laughed...Got to love him!  Well that is all until Monday. 

End of Week 5

Well what a week!  I can not believe we are at the end of week 5.  It is going by so fast.  So I will just start it off with our weigh in from last week.  Needless to say I was not happy with my weigh in last week so I worked hard this week and it has paid off.  I lost 5 pounds this week.  It felt so good to see that loss on the scale.  I have not lost that much since the first week.  I have to say I was very proud of myself.  Now, I want more!  I want that feeling every week.  I was so excited to find out that I was the 4th biggest loser this week which made it even better.  Now my goal is to be first.  So for a total for 5 weeks is 18.2 pounds.  I can't believe that!  I made my choice this morning that I was going to push myself in workouts as hard as I can.  I have worked hard but today I did not care how tired I was I was going to give that extra that I didn't think I had in me.  And I did.  We did a different workout today than normal.  We ran on the upper track plus did some other circuits and I made myself run a full lap on the track without stopping.  I have not been able to do that before!  I know for some that is no big deal but for me it is a HUGE accomplishment!  I know my run is more of a jog but then again 5 weeks ago I could hardly run without being out of breath in less than a minute.  Even moving stuff around at work I would be out of breath and now it is completely different.  It is so crazy to think how just almost 20 pounds has already changed my life so much.  I feel so much better about myself personally and I can not believe how much more energy that I have.  I used to be tired all the time at work and barely make it through the day and now I can go straight through the day and not be tired.  I think the best part of today's workout was the end of it.  I was talking with a friend after work outs and he was saying how proud of me he was for working so hard and doing all of this.  Then he did something that I would not have thought about doing...he grabbed a 20 pound dumbbell and handed it to me.  He told me to hold that and feel what I have lost.  Normally I would be like 20 pounds that is no big deal but as I stood there and held that weight I could not believe how heavy it felt to me.  I then held that weight to my waist and was like that 20 pounds was there!  Now as I write this it makes me want to cry because I know that I could not have done this without this program.  I don't know if I would have had the drive and the will power to do it.  I know that by doing this I have probably saved my life because I don't think I would have ever changed because I had just given up.  But now...that is not an option.  I am so motivated and I am ready to lose that next 20 pounds!

I really don't have any funny stories to tell you this week but Hannah and I did try out a new Saturday class.  We went to Groove.  I guess it would be kind of like Zumba but it was so much fun.  I laughed so hard at Hannah because as she says her "ghetto" side came out.  I think that be my new favorite class.  You do get a good workout but at times you can just do your own silly moves or be crazy.  So I think that is what we are going to do again this week.

Before I rap up this post, I did want to thank everyone for all of your support.  It just makes me feel so good to have all the support behind me.  Everyone is always asking how things are going, and how do I feel and it feels great.  I think this might be the largest group of people that I have ever had behind me.  I also want to do one special thanks.  To Leah, it just means the world to me how much you are supporting me.  I have to say I think you might be my biggest fan!  It just made me feel so good when we talked at the volleyball game.  It just gives me so much more energy to do this with all that support.

I am going to try and post a picture of me now.  I want to put an old picture up beside a new one.  Now just for all of you to see but I am excited to see the difference too.  Last I wanted to add this link to my post.  It is just a minute and half trailer that they have made of us working out.  I love it!  It is very cool.  Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1NmhferCEQ&feature=share

End of Week 4

So, last night was the end of week 4.  It was kind of an upsetting weigh in for me.  I only lost 1.6 pounds for a total of 13.2 pounds in 4 weeks.  I know that it is good and it is a loss but for me I was not happy.  So I am going back to the beginning and starting over with what I am eating.  That has to be what it is.  I have good work outs so I am going to try something new this time.  I want to get everything I can out of this and I do not want to mess this up.  So this week it is all about kicking butt and I want to be the biggest loser next week for weigh in.

In other exciting news: this past Saturday, the "pink ladies" (my team and I), decided to do the spinning class for our Saturday workout.  All I have to say is that it was a killer workout in more ways than one.  We are going on 3 days later and I still feel like I have a bike seat up my butt!  Those bikes do not have comfy seats! I have a lot of padding back there but I don't know what would save my poor behind from that thing.  So I have decided if I do that class again, I am going to go buy an extra padded bike seat for it!

Saturday afternoon I also went and talked with the therapist that is working with us.  I really did not know if I wanted to go. I know I am already crazy!  Do I really need someone telling me that?  So I thought to myself, if I am going to give 110% to this new journey then I should go.  I have to say it was not that bad.  We talked about an hour and I did feel a lot better.  She still wants to meet again next week to continue to talk about things.  I know I have some deep issues about food or I would not be the way and weight that I am right now.  So I am hoping that we can figure out what is the true meaning of what is behind my weight. 

So last funny before I go...I swear everything funny likes to happen to me.  So last night I was working out on the elliptical before our final weigh in and there was an older man running on the treadmill beside me.  I was going very hard and any faster I probably would have fallen right off the machine.  The next thing I know I am "eating and breathing" the worst smell over!  The old man ripped a big fart; I have not smelled anything so bad in my life!  I came to a dead stop and about fell off!  I know that stuff kind of happens but a sorry would be nice but instead you just cover your own face!  So my lesson from last night...I am going to stay way for old men on treadmills!

Don't forget tonight is our show on ABC at 7:30pm.  Sorry if you are not local.

I almost forgot...I wanted to let you know Andrew has also lost weight.  He is up to 8 pounds in the 4 weeks.  Well he first gained 2 pounds from eating everything I could not have anymore and since then he has lost the 8 pounds.  I am so proud of him!

End of Week 3

So I am a little behind on posting this week seeing how it is already Wednesday.  Weigh in went well on Monday.  I lost 2.6 pounds for the week which is a total of 11.6 in 3 weeks.  I was hoping that my loss would be more around the 3.5 range but that just gives me something to work for this week.  The exciting part of the week is that the pink team was not the bottom team so we did not have to do extra credit this week.  My teammate Hannah was the biggest loser overall this week with 6.2 pounds.  I am so proud of her but I told her to watch out because it is on now! 

I think the best part of this past week was Saturday.  We have to do a workout class every Saturday morning.  Hannah and I decided to do Step.  We thought we do this every Wednesday with Amber we can do this.  Nope!  I think I did more laughing at us than working out.  It was so over our heads and we could not keep up.  I kept falling off the step.  I pretty sure we just gave the class some good entertainment.  I will say Hannah did better than I did.  So we planned on doing Groove this weekend which is a dance type class, but after we thought about it for a while we didn't think we would do much better at that.  Let’s face it...I cannot dance!

Last, I do have some great accomplishment that I would like to share.  A little back info first.  So for probably the last year or better to put my wedding ring on I would either have to put it on and off using lotion or cold soap and water.  This week :) I can now take my rings on and off using nothing!  The ring that I wear on my right hand is almost too big and I will probably have to stop wearing it here in the next week or so because it will be too big...not that I am complaining any.  The second great thing that happened to me Tuesday morning was that I fit into an old pair of jeans!  Oh ya...I was not ready to try on my old jeans just in case they did not fit and I didn't want to get depressed about it but I really needed some new jeans and I did not want to go spend 50 bucks on a pair of jeans that I might only wear for a week or two.  So when I tried them on I thought I was going to be sick.  I could not believe that they pulled right up and I even have room to spare!  I had to call Andrew because I was just so excited I could not even stand it.  All he did was laugh at me because he could hardly understand what I was telling him.  Once he figured it out he was still laughing at me.  He loves when I go crazy funny like that :)

You will be glad to know that I did not have any emotional break downs this week.  I think I am finally getting into the swing of things and getting used to everything changing.  I still have my days that I am a bit emotional but I think that is still just from being tired.  I really never realized how crazy our lives are.  Now with doing this, work, and my personal business stuff I really do nothing else.  I feel bad because I sometime feel that I am not being the good wife that I should be.  I am used to cooking and cleaning every night.  Now, I could not tell you the last time I really cooked and cleaning is something that might happen.  Andrew is being so good about things.  He does not complain at all that there is really no food in the house and that he is now the one doing laundry for me.  I feel bad because he has enough of his own stuff to worry about between school and work.  Maybe one of the prizes should be a maid cleaning service because I could really use one around here!  Thanks for all of your help baby...Love you!

Last, I just wanted to let you know that they will be airing an update show of some kind on Tuesday, April 26 at 7:30 pm on ABC (21).  I really don't know what they are going to talk about or show all I know is that it is a half hour long.  Well I think that is about it for this great week.  Off to bed so I can get up early and do a great workout.

Hope you all have a wonderful Easter holiday!

End Of Week 2

What a crazy week this has been.  We are now finished with week 2.  I have had a ton of ups and downs this week.  Last night was our second weigh in and I lost 3.4 pounds.  So that is a total of 9 pounds in two weeks.  I am very proud of myself for what I have accomplished so far.  This has not been easy by any means.  I knew I would be working very hard physically but I don't think I realized how emotional I would be.  Wednesday night I had another full on emotional break down.  Andrew and Carrie were ready to get me some Zanex to calm me down (they said this to make me laugh) :) I know it is just because I have held in all of my emotions in for all of these years all bottled up and now it is coming out with this new lifestyle change that I have been doing.  I guess I never realized how much my weigh really affected me emotionally.  I guess when you tell yourself something for so long you finally start believing it whether it is the truth or now.  The other hardest part is learning how to put myself 1st.  I don't think I have ever done that before.  I want to take care of everyone else and put everyone else’s needs before my own.  I have realized do this I do have to put me first or I am not going to make it through.  I have to stop worrying about what everyone else thinks and trying to please everyone else and just take care of me for once in my life.  I give Andrew and Carrie all the credit in the world for being there for me and giving me great advice.  Love you both.

I do I have say I am very proud of myself for this past week.  We had photo shoot and that is not the easiest place to be on a diet.  I had major self control and I never ate one donut or Panera Bagel (even though I REALLY wanted too!!!)  I stuck to what I had for lunch and followed what I was supposed to.  I now know if I can make it through photo shoot and all of those temptations I know I have the strength and will power to do this.

I know this is going to be one long and ruff week.  Last night at weigh in my team the pink team came in last place for total weigh loss as a team.  So with that being said we get to be at the gym at 5:30 am to do an additional workout with Rick before our other workout.  If it was anything like today it will be a LONG week.  We got to run stairs while carrying 10 pound weights.  Just have to say not to fun!  I look at it this way, all it is going to do is kick my butt and give me a bigger weight loss next week.  So let’s bring on the fun!  Another great thing that is happening this week is that Carrie says she is going to start working out with me at night.  I don't think she knows what she just got herself into.  It might get a little ruff and tuff in our house pretty soon. :)

Thanks again for everyone support and advice.  It really keeps me going!  So off to week 3 and lets see what it brings.

First Week Complete

So our first week is done!  I made it through alive!  Saturday was my first "class" that I went to.  I went to the water aerobics class.  It was really fun.  When we were doing the workout I was like this is not that bad.  Oh was I wrong!  When I went to get out of the pool and my legs started to come out of the water I could hardly walk!  It kicked my butt and I loved it!  I am looking forward to this Saturday's class.  I did take Sunday off.  I figured that I had worked hard and I could have a day off to rest and give my body a break for the day. 

Monday was my first time working out by myself and I was a little nervous but I knew I could do it.  My plan was to get up and go to the spinning class for my last workout before weigh in.  Needless to say I did not make it to the 5:15 class!  So I did an hour on the elliptical machine.  Pretty much thought I was going to die but I had it in my head that I was going to do it no matter what it took.  An hour later I finished!  I did it!  I went over 3 miles in one hour.  I was so excited that I made it but I was ready to die afterwards and unable to feel my legs. 

Monday night was our first weigh in and I was very nervous about it.  I was glad when I got to class and I was not the only one that felt that way.  We had all worked so hard this week and we just wanted to see the difference.  Well being the wonderful pink team we get to weigh in first.  My 3 teammates that weighed in before me kicked butt...and now it was my turn.  When I finally got on the scale and looked at the weight I knew that I had lost but I could not remember my full number from last way in so I could not figure out what I lost.  So after what felt like FOREVER they finally held up the board with my loss...5.6 pounds!!!!!!  I was so excited.  My goal I set for myself was 5 pounds so I was so happy to beat that.  It made me feel so great to know all of my hard work had paid off.  Now for this week I want to loss even more!  It feels so good to see that number finally going down!  We also found out this morning that out of the 5 teams we came in 3 place for weight loss as a team.  I thought that was pretty good.

So now we are off to week 2 and I had a great workout today.  We got to box for the first time today.  Those of you that went to South Whitley Elem. will understand this comment.  The trainer that we had for today was new and she was a younger version of Ms. Gill!  I felt like a little kid again in elem school and scared out of my mind.  I think she might have even been worse than Ms Gill.  I would be very happy if I did not have to work out with her again...she just scared me.  I told Andrew that he better watch out now because I have boxing gloves and if he makes me mad I might have to get this out and show him whose boss! 

Before I wrap this one up my husband told me I needed to let you all in on our fun text conversation today.  A friend of mine told me that his wife was so touched on how supportive that Andrew was through this journey and how he is behind me 100%.  Andrew's comment about that..."I like being behind you...It's a great view...Baby Got Back!!"  My answer was just oh lord...that is what I love most about my husband.  No matter how much I hurt or how bad of a day I am having he can make me laugh like no other!  I love you babe!

I don't know how much time I will have to blog this week since I am at photo shoot all week but I would check back next Monday to see what the new weight loss is.

Work Banner

I forgot to add this to my last post.  This is the banner that I get to look at every day at work.  I am go grateful for all of my co-workers that are behind me 100%!  Thanks guys!

Personal Workout

Well today was my first day with my one on one with our personal trainer.  I did not figure it would be to bad...and I was right.  Today he just mostly showed me what exercises we were going to be doing and how to do them correctly.  Go figure since I have been a previous athlete he said he was not going to be nice to me.  I was waiting on that one.  But I do have to say that I am excited about these work outs.  They are going to more about weight lifting then cardo.  So what out this girl is going to be packing some nice guns soon!  :)

The biggest thing I need to get worked out is food.  I never really thought about it but when you are on a diet all you think about is food.  You have to.  I have never really planned out my meals before and that is what is so hard for me.  So that is what I have been doing today.  I took the day off so I can sit down and read all the new material that they have given us and try and rap my head around it.  I do have to say though I am kind of scared.  I need to go to the store and I just hope that I do not get overwhelmed by everything.  I just want to make the right choices and not fail.  I know I will have some failures along the way but I would rather not have any.

Last...I am going to tell on myself.  I did the one thing this morning that they told us that we could not do the whole 15 weeks!  I weighed myself.  :(  I know it is not all about the weight on the scale, which if it is close to the one we weigh on I have lost some but I think it was more just mental for me.  I needed to know that everything I was doing, I was doing right and the weight was coming off.  I think that is my biggest fear in all of this is that the weight will not come off no matter how hard I work.  I know what Rick (the creator of the program) says is true that "the scale does not lie" but I am just so scared about the scale.  I know it is not all about the number on the scale and as long as you are healthy and at a good weight you should be happy.  I guess I am just afraid that the scale is never going to move off of this weight that I have been at for so long.  I just have to keep remembering to work hard and give it my all and it will come off...just have to have faith!

I also just want to thank everyone for you wonderful comments and posts.  I just can not believe how much love and support I have within all of my family and friends.  I am just so blessed!  Even my brother in law JC said he would not tell me what I want to hear but what I need to hear.  That is why I love you!

Thanks again...Love you all.  Tomorrow first pool workout!  I can't wait! :)

Week One - New Chapter

So this is new for me.  I am not the blogging type but since I am starting this new journey everyone is telling me I should blog about how I am feeling through this major change I am going to be going through.  I am not a writer so you will have to bare with me.

For those of you that do not know, I was selected as one of 26 people to be apart of a competition called The Fort Wayne's Smallest Winner.  It is compared to the Biggest Loser TV show.  It is a 15 week "boot camp" of workouts, nutrition classes and meeting with a behaviorist.  We weigh in every Monday night and have our classes where we either learn about nutrition or how food effects our lives.  Tuesday-Thursday we will have a killer group work out from 6am-7am!  We also have to meet once a week with a personal trainer one on one and last a Saturday work out class.  We also have to run a half marathon the last week of the competition.  That should be fun.

My friend Carrie is the one that told me about this program and that I should apply.  I mean lets face it I have struggle with my weight most of my life but mostly since college.  I realized that I am not at a healthy weight and if we want to ever be able to have kids I need to get by butt and gear and change something.  I am not going to give up on being a mom because of me being selfish and not wanting to take care of myself.  I am ready to do this and start a whole new life and Andrew is along for the ride whether he likes it or not.  :)  He is very excited for me and he is there to push me through.  He was going to apply with me but we could not fit it in between his school and work schedule.   Even though he will not get to go through all the pain with me, he is going through it.  Everything is changing in our house...food, workouts, and being more active and he is right there with me.  I know I would not be able to do this with all of his love and support.  He has even told me more than once, if he has to get out of bed to help get me out of bed because I can't move he will.  I love you baby and thanks for your support.

We are just about to the end of our week one.  It has been such a crazy week of everything new.  Sunday was our orientation were we got to meet our teams, trainers, and everyone else that is involved.  Plus we had our first weigh in.  I am on the pink team...yes pink...my favorite color! :(  The best part about is that I have a candy pink t-shirt that I have to wear to every workout that I do and any promotional event we do.  Yep me in pink for the next 15 weeks.  Super excited about that one!  Our first weigh in was very scary to say the least.  Girls weigh in with just shorts and a sports bra and guys shorts just like the show.  So nothing like meeting all these new people about an hour before you pretty much strip down and stand on a stage in front of everyone and get weighed.  Oh did I mention that everything is being video recorded and photos are being taken.  I can just tell you we were all super excited about that.  I am not going to tell everyone my weight because I am upset over it but I will let you know what I lose every week.  I have a goal that I want to reach in the 15 weeks and I have a final goal weight I want to reach again.  I don't want to set my goal to high for the 15 weeks because I don't want to get down on myself but mark my words I will make my goal weight.

On Monday, we had to fast all day and they did blood work so they can see what kind of difference we are making in our 15 weeks.  We then had our first nutrition class and learned what we are supposed to eat.  We are on a 1600 calorie diet and has it been a big change.  I have really never thought about food that much in my life.  I feel that is all I think about now.  Planning everything to the T to what I am going to eat all day.  It is a little overwhelming to be giving all this stuff on one night and change everything you have been doing your whole life the next day.  I think that has been the hardest thing for me so far and just figuring that all out.

Tuesday morning was our first workout and I didn't know what to expect.  Turns out it was not as bad as I thought it would be.  I think they were just trying to figure out where everyone was physically.  Don't get me wrong I was a little sore but I was still able to walk :)  Wednesday on the other hand was a completely different story.  We did step aerobics with one of our instructors Amber (I think...still learning names) and she is a 5'3" ball of fire!  I figured I got this.  I took this as one of my classes in college no big deal.  I knew it was going to be hard but I did not figure I would have any problems...oh was I wrong.  I had an emotional melt down when we were working out.  I just got so mad at myself that I was having such a hard time doing this.  I am an athlete, this is easy, is what my head was telling me.  I ended up getting so mad at myself that I could not control my breathing and one of the directors Tina came over and starting helping me breath and calming me down.  All I wanted to do was give a 110% and for them to know that I am here to do this and I was so afraid that they would not see that.  She talked me down telling me that I was being to hard on myself and that they could see that I was giving it my everything and that I wanted to be there.  It is just so hard for me to not go back to those basketball competitive days and want to kick everyone’s butt and be the best.  That is always what I did...I had to be the best!  Well to me, I wasn't doing my best...I could do better but I really couldn't.  I was giving it everything I had but my brain just would not let me believe that.  Tina said that if I needed to pick it up they would be in my face yelling at me and I told her she is a pussy cat to Dad and Coach Kessie yelling at me back in the basketball days.  She laughed...she said she would just go crazy mom on me then (that is what past seasons call her).  I know I just have to change my thinking.  I am not that 18 year old basketball player that is in shape and that can play 40 minutes of basketball.  That is where I have to get too.  It is going to be a very long and hard road and I am ready for that.  I just have stop being so hard on myself and know that I am doing the best that I can.  Trust me...walking has become a challenge so far.  Lets just say my co-workers know when I am getting out of my chair and my husband laughs at me telling me I look like an old woman they way I am walking but it is all for a great reason!

I promise you that all of my post will not be this long.  I just wanted to get everyone up to speed that is going on.  Tomorrow is another fun day.  It is my first one on one with my personal trainer.  I will let you know how it goes!  Wish me luck!

If you want to view the website for the program I have attached the link.  You can see everyone that is involved and read about them.
http://www.fortwaynessmallestwinner.com/home.html